Idiots Write About Sports

The World Series figures to end tonight — Thursday, at the latest — with the Boston Red Sox celebrating their first world championship since 1918. At the risk of sounding like the grumpiest man in the room, this does not please me. In part, this is because the World Series has been a real dog, the first one since 1999 to want for drama and compelling games. But mostly, my refusal to join in the nationwide embrace of the Sox boils down to repeated run-ins with drunken or boorish Red Sox fans at stadia across this great land of ours. These people were obnoxious enough when they were fortune’s foe; how insufferable will they be now that they’ve won something?

There is one bright side to this, though. The expiration date on sappy no-one-but-me-knows-what-it’s-like-to-lose-the-big-game pablum looms like an oasis in a desert.

Congratulations to Boston fans on their imminent championship. Now kindly stick a sock in the wailing about how heart-breaking it is to root for a perpetual contender.

Glad to see I am not the only one out there that is tired of the Red Sox and their fans. I used to feel sorry for the team, but this version with Manny and Pedro rub the wrong way. Their fans have become the real "idiots" and I hope they show more class after a series victory than they did after finishing off the Yankees. Their actions will be remembered a lot longer than the curse if they riot like that again. Celebrating is one thing, but no one should die because your sports team won a championship. I understand that the local police need to revise their policies, but the death would have never happened if the "idiots" were not all acting like a 21 year old on New Years Eve night.

I don't mind the team so much. I don't like Derek Lowe and Doug Mirabelli, who acted like jackasses in the A's series last year, but I'm not too worked about either guy. (One's a backup catcher and the other's Derek Lowe -- how can I have my revenge when God's beaten me to the punch?) Curt Schilling and Kevin Millar rub me the wrong way (that's a post for later today, I think). But the rest are all right by me. Hell, I _love_ watching Manny Ramirez play. Name me one other player who can butcher fly balls in left one half of an inning and then remind of you of Babe Ruth in the next -- watching Manny is better than any thrill ride.

No, this is all on the fans. I wish the writers who break out the purple prose to laud the dedication of Red Sox fans would leave the press box every now and again and join me in the bleachers the next time Boston's in town. The poor-put-upon martyr act gets really old, especially when it's being put on by some lunkhead working on his fourth beer of the inning and peppering his conversation with frequent f-bombs.

Hey, did you see how Fox ignored the game for a few pitches last night so they could do an "interview" with Leon, the FICTIONAL CHARACTER from Budweiser commercials? And behind Leon, there were young ladies wearing T-shirts that said "Slam-alama Ding Dong", which is, of course, the catchphrase that a Budweiser commercial pretended that Joe Buck was going to start employing in a shameless bid for money.

Like all unpleasat visuals, I'm trying to block the Leon interview from my mind.

King Kaufman has a few unkind words to say about it at Salon, though ( http://www.salon.com/news/sports/col/kaufman/2004/10/27/wednesday/index1.html#fox ).

let's be fair: game 1 was pretty good.

I've been sick of the Red Sox fans for years, and sadly, I'm pretty sure they're currently six miles away, overturning cars and leaving my hometown in ruins (I live in St. Louis).

The "woe-is-we" act wears thin, but the overbearing gloating has been largely intolerable.

Please leave my city standing, Red Sox fans, and don't let the door hit you on the way out.

And don't get me started on that team that was on the field the last four games, because it wasn't the Cardinals I've watched all season.

Spoken like true Cardinal and Ynakee fans.

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