Idiots Write About Sports

Hastily assembled and poorly considered, here’s what I think is going to happen in the playoff this year.
American League
Minnesota Twins versus New York Yankees: Twins in four
All the analysis of this game seems to hinge on the theory that Johan Santana needs to win both of his theoretical starts in order for the Twins to have a prayer against the mighty Yankees. This ignores two things: 1) Brad Radke isn’t a slouch himself; and 2) the Yankees ain’t as mighty as their reputation might suggest. Sure, they’ve got a great offense, but the starting pitching is the dodgiest it’s been since Joe Torre took over and the bullpen may be prone to suffering the effects of overuse. The Twin bullpen, on the other hand, looks pretty deep to me.
Boston Red Sox versus Anaheim Angels: Red Sox in five.
The Sox rotation just seems more reliable than what the Angels are throwing out there. It’s hard for that great Anaheim bullpen to protect a lead if they’re never handed one. Besides, all season-long, I’ve had the sinking suspicion that the guy who should be closing out Angel wins is pitching in the eighth inning; the loyalty to Troy Percival, while laudable, could come back to haunt Anaheim. Plus, I think this is where all the injuries begin to catch up with the Angels.
And, as I’ll explain later today, I’ve placed a horrible vodoo curse upon Anaheim.
National League
Los Angeles Dodgers versus St. Louis Cardinals: Cardinals in three.
St. Louis is better in every measurable category, except for closer, and Gagne’s got a bum wing. Plus, a Cardinal sweep allows us to keep citing that easy-to-remember stat about the number of Dodger postseason wins since Game Five of the ‘88 Series.
This prediction was, in no way, affected by the Albert Pujols homer that occurred as I typed the above sentence.
Houston Astros versus Atlanta Braves: Braves in five.
It’s the playoff version of the movable object and the resistable force — one of these teams has to slough off their regrettable history of post-season failure. Right? The pick here is the Braves, under the theory that the Astros spent all their bullets just getting here.
In the ALCS, I’ll take the Twins over the Sox in seven, and the Cards sending the Braves off to the losers’ lounge in five. In a rematch of the ‘87 series — hey, remember when “Walk Like an Egyptian” was sweeping the nation? — the Twins take the World Series in six games.
Now, just bet the opposite of what I told you, and you’ll never have to look for work again.