Idiots Write About Sports

So sometime in the 2004 season — Marco Scutaro’s first season with Oakland — he had a clutch base hit to win a game (as is his wont apparently.) The details of the event have faded with time, but a couple of things stand out: Marco Scutaro was pulled aside for a post-game interview, and my wife happened to hear it.
“You know,” she said. “He kind of sounds like Junior Addleburg.” And if you ever saw the TV series Home Movies, you would agree that she was one to something.
But, of course, you didn’t see the series, because it only aired for four seasons before getting canceled. If you and the rest of America would have only bothered to watch Home Movies when it was on, we would have a common frame of reference, and you would understand that my wife was right on the money. But you didn’t and now you’re just going to have to take my word for it. You can’t even rent the DVD since that only covers season one, and Junior doesn’t make his appearance until season two.
Anyway, Marco Scutaro kinda sounds like Junior Addleburg. You’re just going to have to trust me on this.

One of these men is not Marco Scutaro
You will also have to trust me on the fact that my wife does a very good impersation of the Junior Addleburg voice. And that she breaks into that impersonation every time she claps eyes on Marco Scutaro. Like when we’re at A’s games and Scutaro comes to the plate. Which is exactly what she did during every Scutaro at-bat of the second game of the season against the hated Yankees (the game Scutaro won with a base hit, which, as we have established is his wont).
“You’re getting pretty good at that impression,” I said to my wife, pre-late inning Scutaro heroics. “Pretty soon, you’re going to be able to star in your own one-woman show about Marco Scutaro. You can call it Marco… Solo!”
To her everlasting credit, my wife did not begin divorce proceedings on the spot. “How long have you been waiting to break that joke out?” was all she asked.
“Pretty much since the 2004 season,” I said to her. Because as Marco Scutaro knows, it’s all about the timing.