Idiots Write About Sports

You know what I really hate?

The indignities of daily life? Other people? Yourself?

Yes, yes, I hate all of that. But today, the thing I particularly hate on this morning is when Fox uses a local-yokel analyst as part of its baseball play-by-play teams.

More specifically, I hate when Fox picks up an A’s game and uses the other team’s local-yokel analyst.

It’s using nothing personal, unless the yokel in question is Rex Hudler. It’s just that the local-yokel, while well-versed in the comings and goings of his own team, knows next to nothing about the opponent. So the depth of analysis tends to be one-sided at best and infuriatingly inaccurate at worst.

Case in point: I am watching the Fox telecast of the A’s-Tigers game in which the color commentary is coming from Rod Allen, who is part of the Tigers broadcast team. (I never much cared for Allen during my MLB Extra Innings days. He’s not as bad as Hudler or the nincompoops employed by the Seattle Mariners, but he’s certainly more on the poor end of the scale, at least in my opinion. But that’s neither here nor there.) The A’s have a runner on second in the top of the first. There are two outs and Eric Chavez is up at the plate.

Rod Allen decides this is the perfect time for the Tigers to pitch around Chavez. “I know it’s very early, but you do have the base open and you do have the two outs going against the left-handed hitter in Chavez,” Allen says. “Left-handers have really clobbered [Detroit starter Zach Miner] this year.”

That’s some good local insight there, Rod. Now let me share with you a few things from an Oakland fan’s perspective.

* Eric Chavez ain’t clobbering anyone right now. According to the Chronicle, he’s driven in one run in the last 19 games. Take that back to June 8, and he’s hitting a crisp .132; he’s struck out 33 times in that time frame.

* Do you really want that extra base-runner on there with Frank “All I Do Is Homer Now” Thomas next up in the lineup?

* Seriously — any base hit that he gets is by accident right now. Maybe you noticed him going 0-5 in last night’s game and hitting a weak comebacker to end the A’s last-ditch rally in the ninth?

The Tigers, who are apparently smarter than Rod Allen, did not pitch around Eric Chavez. And Chavez obliged them by popping out to right to end the inning.

Then again, I shouldn’t be too hard on Rod Allen. Sure, he seems to think that Eric Chavez can still hit right now, but then again, so does Ken Macha, since he keeps battting Chavez fourth. Allen’s excuse is that he rarely gets to see the A’s play; Macha supposedly watches every game. You’d think someone might show him a stat sheet every now and again.

Post a comment